A Damaged Soul
by Kjpanny Kjchristie17
Summary: Inuyasha blames Kikyou's death on Kagome and abuses her. But when that abuse becomes too much too bear, and an unlikely savior comes to the young miko's rescue, will he collect the pieces of her shattered heart or will Inuyasha's demon return to claim its mate?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Kagome trudged along the road, wearily. Her feet were killing her. Her head was killing her. Her back was killing her. She stopped for a second and threw her head back, groaning. _What was the point, every part of her body was killing her._

"Hurry up wench! We ain't got all day!"

She sighed, adjusted her backpack and walked on. Beside her, Shippou gave her a concerned look, "Kagome, you alright?"

She smiled, making sure not to reveal her emotions to her little companion, "I'm fine Shippou."

Shippou just nodded, not believing her. From behind them came Miroku's cheerful voice, "I do believe that it's time to set up camp. Kagome looks tired. I don't believe she should be walking, not with her injuries."

Kagome closed her eyes, knowing what was going to happen next.

Inuyasha's angry voice snapped, "Well she should think about that before she scattered the damn jewel again!"

Sango immediately got defensive, "It wasn't her fault Inuyasha! If Kikyou hadn't-"

"SHUT UP!"

Inuyasha was suddenly standing in front of Sango, his teeth bared threateningly, "Kikyou knew what she was doing. If this little bitch hadn't interfered, she would still be alive!"

Miroku, placed his staff, between the hanyou and his beloved. His voice was light but there was a slight hardness somewhere inside, "That is enough Inuyasha. Kagome will collapse any moment. She's alive. Kikyou was already dead."

Before Inuyasha could speak, Kagome stepped in, with a smile for Miroku, "It's allright you guys. My injuries aren't that bad. They're better, believe me." She placed a gentle hand on Inuyasha's arm, "Don't be mad at them Iuyasha!"

Inuyasha jerked his arm from under her hand, "Don't touch me. And don't tell me what to do." Kagome reared back as if she had been slapped. Her voice remained steady, "Of course. I'm sorry Inuyasha."

He just sent her a disgusted look and walked past her. Kagome just stared at the ground blindly, her heart numb. She should be used to this.

_He's just grieving. He's just grieving._ She kept telling herself that as she smiled at the pitying look on her friends' faces.

She turned and started walking again, her head bent. Her heart was dark and heavy and her chest felt stifled. She breathed in slowly trying to get rid of whatever that was blocking her chest.

She smiled bitterly at the hanyou's back. _I was stupid to hope that he would change. I should have known._ Unbeknownst to her, the edge of the shards around her neck darkened slightly.

Her back was still not healed and the gash against her shoulder was hurting her. She wanted to cry, she wanted to crawl into a dark corner, away from everybody, everything. Instead, she just straightened her shoulders, smiled cheerfully, and walked on.

Smile. It seemed that was all she did. Smile day and night. No matter what the situation, she always wore a smile. When Inuyasha insulted her, she smiled and laughed. Sometimes she couldn't. Sometimes, she just nodded politely, but she felt that by smiling everything would be alright. Not that it would but that smile was her only barrier against the pain, the misery. She held onto the belief that maybe, just maybe, if she kept smiling, everything would be alright with her world again. Inuyasha would be himself, but somewhere inside her, a part of her knew that it wasn't going to happen. And that part of her was slowly poisoning her soul. She struggled against it but sometimes she wondered why she couldn't just give up. Wouldn't it be easier that way? She could go home, seal the well, and forget anything ever happened.

But she knew she couldn't do it. What would happen to Inuyasha, to Miroku and Sango, to Shippou? If they didn't find the shards and defeat Naraku, Miroku's wind tunnel would destroy him and Sango would lose another important figure in her life. Shippou would be alone and unprotected.

She now knew that Inuyasha wasn't going to protect her. He had told her that very clearly after Kikyou died. It wasn't her fault. Why couldn't he see that?

_Inuyasha howled as his beloved turned to dust in his arms and Kagome's trapped soul returned to her._

"_Inuyasha?" she ventured softly._

_He turned to her, getting to his feet. She gasped as she read the cold fury and hatred in his eyes. Before she could say anything, she was backhanded into the wall. Whimpering, she tried to speak once again, but as she raised her head, she saw something that she had never believed she would see in her life. He had raised his hand and he before she could blink, he swiped._

_The sensation of shock numbed her from the immediate pain, she felt as the gashes on her shoulder spurted blood. Had he just attacked her? He grabbed her hair, and smashed her face into the wall, a part of him controlled, aware that he could not kill his shard detector. Oh, but he could certainly hurt her._

_She had backed away like_ _a cornered_ _animal, her breath escaping in short, shallow pants, her eyes filled with fear, pain and most of all denial. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she wondered why she couldn't say anything. It was like her heart had stopped. She cried out as he hit her but she couldn't understand why. She couldn't even use her voice except for the gasps of pains and the cries._

_He kicked her in her stomach and her abdomen. Her mouth pooled with blood as she started losing consciousness. Thank God! Was her only thought, as she had blacked out._

_When she awoke, her first aid kit was tossed near her. She could feel his presence near the mouth of the cave. She lay in her pool of blood, only semi-aware of her surroundings. Why had he attacked her? Was this the same half demon that she was in love with. Her eyes fell upon the jewel encrusted dagger lying a few feet from her body._

_Was that hers?_

_She stifled a cry of pain and dragged herself up trying to fix whatever she could of her injuries._

It was very dark when Inuyasha finally stopped to set camp. Kagome immediately picked up her supplies and smiled, "I'm going to take a bath."

Sango looked at her, "Do you want me to come with you Kagome?"

Kagome shook her head, "No, you can finish whatever you're doing. I'll be awhile."

She turned around, knowing that Inuyasha had not moved an inch, nor had his ears flicked in her direction. Her smile remained on her face even though she was alone now. She just couldn't get rid of it.

She reached the springs and took of her clothes. The moonlight reflected her raw wounds in the water, and her smile vanished, she her heartbeat fastened. She lowered herself into the water, crying out in pain as her the rawness stung sharply.

Finally submerged in the water, she just stood there, her mind blank. Her smile was now replaced with a blank look, her anguish eating her up from the inside, yet it was like she did not know how to react to it. So she just stood there.

Lord Sseshoumaru walked through the forest, his mind occupied by his ward. She was growing up and asking strange questions everyday. Questions he refused to answer as they were a female's job. He wondered whether the half breed's miko would assist him. She had been kind to Rin the few times she met her.

The miko was indeed an enigma. He had never known someone so pure in his life. She held his fascination and he had observed her from time to time. Her behavior was strange, even more so her clothes. She dressed like a harlot, yet she didn't act like one, and called herself a priestess.

The sudden scent of jasmine halted him in his tracks. It couldn't be. She was here in the forest. He sniffed again. The halfbreed was not with her but a bear youkai hovered close by. Too close by. He frowned in distaste. Inuyasha had left the girl alone. He changed direction, knowing that he would have to get rid of the youkai. He needed the girl alive for Rin. Maybe he could save her and demand her service as payment. Not dishonorable.

Kagome had been rinsing her hair when she sensed it. A bear youkai. Stiffening she turned around slowly and saw it standing a few feet from her. The hungry gleam in it's eyes paralyzed her. At once, her mind screamed _DANGER! RUN!_, but she remained where she was. She didn't scream because she knew Inuyasha wouldn't come. Maybe this was for the best. Maybe it would only be painful for a few minutes.

She stared at it and it stared back at her. She wondered whether death was painful when she saw it move slightly. Slightly puzzled, she wondered why it wasn't attacking. She cocked her head and in the back of her mind, she wondered whether she was insane, contemplating death as she would the weather.

Then it pounced. It slashed its claws against her chest and she gave a small cry of pain. She fell back into the water, her mind surprisingly clear. The youkai, bit down on her shoulder and then the pain started making itself aware. Tears escaped her eyes but she still didn't scream. Instead she smiled as her life force ebbed from her body.

Then she saw a flash of white and the bear youkai was flung several metres from her. She was now floating in the water, her blood mixing in the clear stream.

"Miko."

She smiled and closed her eyes, exhausted.

Seshoumaru.

An elegant brow was raised as he saw her embrace death like a long lost friend. Then she was gone. He would never admit it, but in the slivery moonlight, her body, which was floating gently on the water, looked beautiful Her dark hair, was spread out, giving her the appearance of an angel.

_Maybe this is what is called the beauty of death,_ he wondered.

Then he unsheathed the Tensiaga. His amber eyes furrowed in concentration, he slashed once, over the still body, killing the imps from hell.

And a breath escaped her body once more. Satisfied, yet oddly irritated, he picked her up and turned around. Placing her on the ground, he stared at her nude body, without much interest. She was truly beautiful, but he had seen much beauty. It was her pure heart that truly held his interest. She was probably the first human of his acquaintance that was so pure. Her self sacrificing was, although admirable feat, yet still strange. But right now, he hadn't seen the miko who would stand up and yell at him. Instead, what he had seen was a lone woman, weary of life and wanting a quick release. What had his brother done? Maybe he should ask him.

"Half breed."

"Bastard."

Inuyasha stepped from among the trees, his eyes cold.

"Why did you not defend your woman?"

Inuyasha shrugged, "She _killed_ my woman. And no matter how much she wishes, she's not gonna take her place."

Oddly, the hanyou did not seem in any mood to fight. Seshoumaru recalled the only time, he had seen Inuyasha's eye turn this cold. When the villagers had slaughtered his mother.

"You blame her for killing the undead priestess?"

"Keh."

Seshoumaru looked at Kagome lying on the ground, vulnerable, "Interesting. I always knew you were slow witted, but not to this extent."

The quick flash of rage was all he saw before Inuyasha composed his features, and gritted through his teeth, his tone a complete contrast to his calm and schooled expression "What the hell are you talking about, bastard?"

"This Seshoumaru recalls that the undead priestess was working with Naraku."

At that Inuyasha's rage erupted, "Kikyou never betrayed me!"

"Are you sure, Inuyasha? Or are you only trying to convince yourself of this? You hurt the priestess that is alive to convince yourself that the one who is dead, never betrayed you?"

He picked up Kagome in his arms, and covered her body with the garments strewn on the ground. Turning around, he said in a quiet voice, "From what I remember, this is the same human that has not only accepted you for what you are, but defends you when you are not present. You have truly disgraced our father."

With that, he left Inuyasha, turning into a ball of pure energy, and rushing towards the camp. Inuyasha stood their, his head bowed with anger and confusion, his hands fisted tightly and his claws pricking into his skin.

Back at the camp, Sango and Miroku were startled when Sesoumaru appeared with a very nude Kagome. He walked over to the demon slayer and laid Kagome at her feet, "You will dress her." He commanded.

Sango rushed to Kagome's side, "What happened to her?"

Seshoumaru retreated to sit beneath a tree, "She was attacked."

Miroku was tanding as he asked, "You saved her?"

Ina flat voice, Seshoyumaru corrected, "She died. This Seshoumaru revived her."

Sango's hands shook violently when she heard that, but she didn't say anything and dressed Kagome's wounds, tears pouring down her face. Her sister was going to be scarred for life, just like she was.

She dressed Kagome and Seshoumaru got up and before she could blink, Kagome was cradled in his arms.

Sango got to her feet as Miroku raised his staff threateningly, "Just what the hell do you think you are doing?"

He simply raised a brow, "I require the miko's assistance. The half breed is now unable to take care of her, so will now be under my protection. Her life belongs to me now."

Sniffing out the items with Kagome's scent on it, he picked them up, and glanced at the fox demon who was nearly in tears, "I believe the miko would want you to be with her when she awakens."

Shippou looked at him and nodded bravely. Gently, he climbed onto Kagome's uninjured arm and the three of them disappeared due to the inuyoukai's speed.

Sango just collapsed on the floor unable to believe what had just happened.

Just then Inuyasha charged in, "Where the hell is that bastard and Kagome!?"

They stared at him.

**A.N: I had written this story on mediaminer, and had intended to leave it alone, since I wasn't too happy with it. But because a favourite reviewer of mine, RubyJeweller, requested me to complete it, I am abiding by her request. She has been with me since I started writing on and loyalty means a lot to me, so this entire story is dedicated to you, Ruby**.

**And on another note, since I have become such a fan of Kagome and Seshoumaru pairing, I might just go in that direction. This is meant to be an Inuyasha and Kagome pairing, but who knows. Time will tell.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A Damaged Soul**

**Chapter** **2**

"Seshoumaru took her with him."

"HE WHAT!?" Roared the enraged hanyou.

This time Sango spoke up, anger lacing her tone, "What are you so angry about? Ever since Kikyou died, all you've been telling her is that she's not worth shit. You blame her for that clay doll's death when we all know that Kikyou was working with Naraku. You selfish bastard! All Kagome did was defend herself and she even got all those injuries, but has she complained once? NO!"

Her voice rose in anger, and fury radiated from her body as she screamed at him, "You've been driving her like a pack mule. I'm surprised that she hasn't died yet, with all the pain she's suffering. I saw her wounds, Inuyasha and they hurt her! She can't sleep at night because they're still raw and they hurt her! But do you care? NO! Have you heard her at night? She keeps trying to stiffle her cries, because moving hurts her. But you don't care, do you? As long as your precious shards are collected, why should you care?"

Sango took a deep breath, her face red now, "I'm happy she's with Seshoumaru now. At least he'll protect her. I can't say the same about you though."

Miroku, who also looked angry put his arms around her and from behind and whispered, "Cease love."

Sango still shook with rage but her breathing had calmed down somewhat as she said quietly, "What has Kagome ever done to you, except love you? She accepts you for what you are. Kikyou never did. She has given up her life to search for the shards and has not once complained and this is how you repay her? I wouldn't be surprised if she goes back home and never returns again."

Inuyasha whose eyes were hidden by his bangs, let out a strangled gasp and turning around jumped into the trees and raced off into the forest, to be alone with his thoughts. His heart twisted with anguish. Over what, he couldn't tell. Was it because Kikyou was gone and everyone said she was working with Naraku? Or was it because he had hurt Kagome again and this time not only mentally? He had lost control of himself when he had seen Kikyou dying and the dagger in Kagome's hand. He had been horrified at himself afterwards but whenever he had thought about saying anything to Kagome, Kikyou's face immediately swam in his mind and his heart grew cold and bitter and he tortured Kagome some more, wanting her in pain, enjoying her pain.

_Am I really that much of a monster?_ He thought bitterly, as the wind whipped his hair back, _Did_ _I really enjoy causing Kagome pain? She didn't leave me. She still didn't leave me._

He chanted that like a mantra in his head till he reached the springs.

Standing in front of the water, he gazed at his reflection.

_I stood there and watched her get killed._

_I stood there and watched her get. . ._

_I stood there and watched her. . ._

_I stood there and watched. . ._

_I stood there and. . ._

_I stood there. . ._

_I stood. . ._

_I._ _. ._

He fell to his knees, gripping his head in his hands almost wildly as everything hit him. What he had done to Kagome, how he had made her suffer. He had watched her accept death even when it was still a few feet away. He remembered seeing her smile when the claws came into contact with her fragile skin. She didn't whimper like she had done when he had turned on her. Had he really driven her to this? Had he really broken the girl that loved life because she was life itself? He howled out his grief and anguish to the skies as his eyes shifted from amber to red and from red to amber, his beast begging to come out.

Far away, Seshoumaru lifted his head as he heard his brothers howl of anguish and a slight unease crept into his mind. Almost surprise, he cast it away, and looked at the unconscious miko, lying a few feet from him, the dancing shadows of the fire, giving her covered body an ethereal effect. The little kit trembled in his sleep and cuddled closer into his surrogate mother.

He extended his aura to check for any lingering youkai, and finally satisfied that he had dispersed of them all, settled in silence to study this odd human.

Was she really that tired of life that she wanted to die? Was this that same girl he had seen only a month ago, smiling?

Her shoulders and back were covered in claw marks, not of the bear youkai's but of something else. They were only a week old, and had not healed. Her face showed signs of fatigue and her eyes held dark circles under them, but what worried Seshoumaru was, and nothing worried Seshoumaru, that her aura was starting to show a little darkness.

She moaned in her sleep and he raised his eyes to her face. Her face was twisted as if in pain, and her aura was pulsing with pain and darkness. It was like heartbeat, aloud heartbeat.

Seshoumaru stared at her before deciding to wake her up. But before he could move, her eyes shot open of their own accord and she sat up straight, gasping out. Her sheet slipped down leaving her upper body bare, except for the bandages.

Kagome's eyes stared into his for like a second before she realized her predicament, and she gave a loud cry, grabbing the sheet. That movement stretched her wounds and this time, a shrill cry of pain escaped her lips, as she lay back, trying to ease it.

"L-Lord Seshoumaru?"

"Yes, miko."

Kagome bit back a gasp of pain, before murmuring, "What are you doing?"

He stared at her wondering whether the pain had addled her mind. Finally, he breathed out, "This Seshoumaru is sitting, as you can well see."

She blushed, clutching the sheet closer to her, "No what I meant is, what are you doing here. With me."

He looked at her, and didn't answer for a few minutes, "This Seshoumaru revived you using the Tensaiga."

Her face went blank, "So I died back at the hot springs?"

Very simply, he said, "Yes."

She turned her head away from him, "You should have let me die. Why did you bring me back?"

Seshoumaru was amazed at the fact that she was still talking despite the fact that her wounds were still too painful for a human.

"I do not answer to you miko. My reasons are my own"

She remained silent. He did not bother to breach it till he scented something form her, "You will tell this Seshoumaru why your scent is changing?"

Her tone was bitterly mocking as she replied, "I do not answer to you, my lord."

He snarled at her rudeness, but did not do anything else. They remained in silence till she slipped out of consciousness, leaving the taiyoukai to guard her, as unwilling as he was.

He stared at her unmoving form, wondering whether in her current state the miko was the best candidate for teaching Rin. But since he wasn't going to let any other human near him or his ward, she was the only candidate. He silently contemplated his problem, as the night grew darker and his brother's inhuman howls became more and more anguished.

It was dawn when Inuyasha returned to camp. His slumped form and his bloodshot eyes prevented Sango from verbally attacking him. Instead she chose to send him quiet glares over cooking breakfast. However he was too lost in his own thoughts to even be aware of the demon slayer.

_If I go to her now, would she come with me?_ _Probably not._ He thought bitterly. _Not with all that I've done to her._ _Maybe if I apologize she'll forgive me._ Then he snorted to himself. _Not even she would forgive me._ _Maybe if I begged._

His beast whined inside him, twisting in agony. Inuyasha took a deep breath trying to calm it down. He didn't know why his youkai was so upset. It wanted to be let out. But not to kill.

However it raged within him, refusing to be soothed. He was trying his best to ignore it when Miroku questioned, "Should we continue on to the South, Inuyasha? That is where the shard was detected."

Inuyasha nodded and stood up, ignoring his bowl of untouched food. He got up and was about to speak when something caught his eye. He crouched down and picked up the rough cotton handkerchief. It smelled of Kagome's scent, and his throat clogged as bitter memories rushed into his head. His heart turned over in his chest and twisted painfully as he realized that this was the only thing of Kagome's that he had left. He hid the cloth in his haroi, directly on top of where his heart was. Her scent soothed her, till something else caught his attention.

"Where is Shippou?"

Sango avoided his gaze as she picked up the bowls, "Seshoumaru took him with him."

His pain threatened to surface again as his beast groaned inside him, _**He took our mate and pup."**_

That suppressed thought immediately startled Inuyasha, _Mate? Pup?_ Since when have I considered them as such?

His beast answered still writhing in pain, _**`She has always been our mate and the kit has always been our pup. You just refused to accept them. Let me out. Your human nature has hurt our mate. We need to soothe them. They need us."**_

Inuyasha let out a low growl, unknowingly startling his companions. _She needs me to stay away from her. And you are just a bloodthirsty beast when you come out._

_**`And she still loved us when we took on that form. She was the only on who managed to calm us down.**_ _**We will not kill this time. We just want to retrieve our mate.'**_

Inuyasha growled again and suppressed his beast. His eyes half red, he snapped at Sango and Miroku, "Well, what the hell are you waiting for? Let's get moving!"

A little wary they followed him out, each one of them lost in his own thoughts.

A.N: Okay, here's the thing...I suck at editing. And I am starting to hate this story...Literally. It feels so childish and immature. But if you guys want, I'll just post the already written chapters as they are, and then I'll pick up the story where I last left it. What do you guys think?

Oh, and on a side note...I got this review...I kind of feel insulted, well it seemed rude, so here's a suggestion for everyone. If you don't like it, you don't read it. Lecturing me isn't giving anybody bonus points. I put this pairing as Inuyasha and Kagome at first because that had been my initial plan. I am sticking in that direction also. This will be a an Inuyasha/Kagome pairing.


End file.
